To Agnes McLehose (Clarinda)
                                              Castle Douglas 25th June? 1794

Before you ask me why I have not written you; first let me be informed of you, how I shall write you? "In friendship," you say; & I have many a time taken up my pen to try an epistle of "Friendship" to you; but it will not do: 
'tis like Jove grasping a pop-gun, after having wielded his thunder.- when I take up the pen, Recollection ruins me.- 

Ah! My dearest Clarinda!- Clarinda?- what a host of Memory's tenderest offspring crowd on my fancy at that sound!- But I must not indulge that subject: you have forbid it.-

I am extremely happy to learn that your precious health is re-established, & that you ate once more fit to enjoy that satisfaction in existence, which health alone can give us.- My old Friend, Ainslie has indeed been kind to you.- Tell him that I envy him the power of serving you.- I had a letter from him a while ago, but it was so dry, so distant, sp like a card to one of his Clients, that I could scarce bear to read it, & have not yet answered it.- He is a good, honest fellow; & can write a friendly letter, which would do equal honor to his head & his heart, as a whole sheaf of his letters I have by me will witness; & though Fame does not blow her trumpet at my approach now , as she did then , when he forst honoured me with his friendship, yet I am as proud as ever; & when I am laod in my grave, I wish to be stretched at my full length, that I may occupy every inch of ground which I have a right to.-

You would laugh, were you to see my, where I am just now: would to Heaven you were here to laugh with me, though I am afraid that crying would be our first employment.- Here am I set, a solitary hermit in the solitary room of a solitary inn, with a solitary bottle of wine by me- as grave & as stupid as an owl- but like that owl, still faithful to my own song; in confirmation of which, my dear Mrs Mack, here is your good health! May the hand-wal'd benisons o' Heaven bless your bonie face; & the wretch wha skellies at your welfare, may the auld tinkler deil get him to clout his rotten heart!
Amen!

You must know , my dearest Madam, that these now many years wherever I am, in whatever company, when a married lady is called as a toast, I constantly give you; but as your name has never passed my lips, even to my most intimate friend, I give you by the name of Mrs Mack.- This is so well known among my acquaintances that when my; married lady is called for, the toast-master will say-"o, we need not ask him who it is- here's Mrs Mac!" I have also among my convivial friends, set on foot a round of toasts which I call, a round of Arcadian Shepherdesses; that is, a round of favourite Ladies, under female names celebrated in ancient song; & then, you are my Clarinda:- so my lovely Clarinda, I devote this glass of wine to a most ardent wish for your happiness!-

In vain would Prudence with decorous sneer,
Point out a cens'ring world, & bid me fear:
Above that world on wings of love I rise,
I know its worst-& can that worst despise.-

"Wronged, injured, shunned, unpitied, unredrest;
The mocked quotation of the scorner's jest"-
Let prudence direst bodements on me fall,
Clarinda, rich reward! O'erpays them all!

I have been rhyming a little of late, but I do not know if they are worth Postage.-

* * *
Tell me what you think of the following-
Monody-

How cold is that bosom which folly once fired,(Click for full poem)

The subject of the foregoing is a woman of fashion in this country, with whom at one period, I was well acquainted.- By some scandalous conduct to me, & two or three other gentlemen here as well as me, she steered so far to the north of my good opinion, that I have made her the theme of several illnatured things.- The following epigram struck me the other day, as I passed her carriage.-

Pinned to Mrs R______'s coach-

If you rattle along like your Mistress's tongue,

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